Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Ladies - What You Should Do If Your Man Doesn't Want to Commit



Your man doesn't want to commit. It's a difficult situation to be in. Emotionally you likely feel torn. Here you are fortunate enough to have met the man you are destined to spend your life with but he's more than happy to continue on as your boyfriend endlessly. Meanwhile you sit there quietly and painfully watching friend after friend walk down the aisle towards wedded bliss with their man. Are you going to have to spend the next several years pining away for an engagement ring that will never come or is there something you can do to speed the process along? You can get the man you love to want to commit to you. It's actually something that you can start working on right now.

Before you can get the man to commit you have to determine what it is that is holding him back. In some cases, the man has a very valid reason for being wary of a super serious relationship. He may have come from a broken home that was ripe with difficult emotions and conflict. Or perhaps he's feeling overwhelmed with the idea of how soon after marriage many couples have children. He may not emotionally feel ready for such an adventure.

Talk to him openly about commitment and then gauge how he reacts to you. If he changes the subject more than once, chances are good that his reluctance isn't based on anything tangible. He may be the type of man who doesn't see a need to change something that is already giving him everything he needs. This often happens when a couple lives together and the woman presses for marriage. The man feels that they already are a committed couple and he simply doesn't want to go through what he views as the hassle of getting married.

If you do indeed feel that your boyfriend just doesn't want to commit because he feels he already has you that requires a specific set of actions on your part. You need to show him that he shouldn't feel so secure in the relationship. Obviously you don't want to do anything too drastic and risk losing the relationship but you do need to shake the foundation of it a bit. The best advice for you if your man doesn't want to commit is to pull back a bit. You have to start living more as a single woman than one who is already in a married relationship without all the trappings that come with it.

Focus on your own life more. Go out with your friends and start planning your future alone. You should be dropping subtle hints around the house such as throwing out all your bridal magazines and dropping the word "commitment" from your vocabulary. Let your man see that unless he gets serious about a committed future with you, you may not be around for much longer. That's enough to jolt any man into understanding that his girlfriend's needs have to start coming first.



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