Thursday, April 28, 2011

How To Stop His Fear Of Physical Intimacy From Haunting Him



Men have their weak sides that they try not to show. Men are afraid to let down their guard and show people who they really are. Since prehistoric times, men have been putting lots of effort in maintaining their macho image which leads some men into having a fear of physical intimacy, since physical intimacy might lead emotional intimacy, and emotional intimacy, to vulnerability. This kind of fear of intimacy in men is unexpected, because intimacy's definition for a man is typically physical intimacy, but the fear of vulnerability can be strong.

For most women, physical intimacy cannot bear to exist without emotional intimacy. The feeling of closeness is really significant for women because they believe that the secret to a lasting relationship is being able to talk openly about their feelings, dreams, frustrations, and a lot more, to the other party. Men find themselves afraid to get intimate with their "prospects," because they will have to talk about their feelings and to be vulnerable. As John Gray, author of "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus" puts it, "when a man loves a woman, periodically he needs to pull away before he can get closer."

Heartbreaks are painful, and men's heartbreaks are no exception. Having once been cheated or hurt, they put up barriers in their hearts which prevent them from loving or being loved. Once a man already knows the pain that comes with broken and exhausting relationships, he can have difficulty trusting and will be hesitant to be intimate with a person.

Another reason why men develop a fear of physical intimacy is the possibility that when they enter a committed relationship, their freedom will be limited. No matter how mature men are, they still want to do some things on their own such as watching adrenalin-punched football games with their friends. Since some women tend to be so clingy and needy, men shy away from being near to the opposite sex for fear of restriction.

However, men's fear of physical intimacy is not a permanent state. There are ways to break down their barriers. If he's reeling from a broken heart, show that you are a different person. Don't be impatient though because he might avoid you for looking desperate. Pressuring him to forget his fear and disappointment will only remind him of the stereotypes he has built up. While waiting, don't forget to do things that will make him feel special.

If a man fears that you will invade his personal space, let him know that you're mature enough to take care of yourself. Men admire women who are confident, so let him see that you can be emotionally independent. This way, he will see that you won't bug him if you're crying over a touching episode of your favorite drama special.

The best treatment to cure his fear of physical intimacy is to remove it little by little. Find ways to entice him to show you his vulnerability. In the end, he will be thankful for someone like you for not giving up on him.



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