How to Nurture and Maintain a Successful Relationship

Some people say that love is the key to a successful relationship. They feel that it is enough to sustain them in tough times, support them through any difficult patches, and enhance their life in the good times. And it is true, to feel love for and from another person is a wonderful position to be in.

But what about the other people, who perhaps wonder if they have ever loved their partner, or feel that they once did but now those feelings have gone? Some people have long-term relationships with their partners, believe that they do not truly love them as they should, but none the less feel that they are in a good, mutually affectionate relationship. It is an important part of their lives.

There are many considerations to having an enduring and satisfying relationship. Incorporating these into our approach can bring closeness and sharing into a supportive, successful relationship. We have to nurture our important relationship, let it be seen to matter to us and that we are prepared to care for it and maintain it. Let us have a look at several of these factors.

- Treat each other well. Doing nice things for each other, noticing little things that our partner might like to have, or sending a 'thinking of you' text occasionally can make the other person feel special, attractive and valued.

- Space and privacy. Some people like to share everything with their partner, from the content of every text message, to bathroom rituals. Other people find that level of intimacy claustrophobic and value having some quiet time and space in their lives. Respecting each others needs is important.

Some people enjoy having hobbies, activities and friends separate to their main relationship. They feel that it helps maintain their identity and adds value to their relationship. It adds interest to them and to their conversations.

- Time together is important in building any relationship. Shared interests build connections, memories and closeness. It is also important to compromise and participate in activities that may not appeal at times. Being supportive of ones partner demonstrates caring. Occasionally attending important family events, biting ones tongue and being pleasant is an important part of successful co-existence. And by appreciating how important this sharing is to ones partner in enabling them to feel supported.

- Respect each other. It can be easy to take for granted the person whose hard work and effort goes into earning money, working long hours to support the household. Sometimes taking time to demonstrate respect and appreciation of the stress and commitment required to keep the bills paid and sustain the quality of life can make a big difference.

It is also important to appreciate the person who does the shopping, laundry, keeps the house clean and tidy. This can often be the unseen effort, the automatic unnoticed part of a household's support system. Remembering to say 'thank you' from time to time can improve the relationship and make a person feel valued and special. It is also important to reciprocate sometimes, take a turn at doing some of the chores, make an effort to participate in the household, not expect the other person to provide a maid service and clear up after us.

- Humour is for many people an essential part of a relationship and one of the most attractive qualities. Being with someone who makes us laugh is an important bonus in a relationship. It often helps to defuse tense situations and keeps a relationship alive. Learning to laugh at ourselves stops us taking ourselves too seriously too.

- Honesty keeps communications genuine. We can often sense if someone is being false, saying things just to keep us happy or quiet. They may not be being dishonest but it can certainly come across as insincere. Being honest with each other, in a sensitive respectful way is a key part of sustaining and maintaining an adult relationship.